You are Proudly South African when….

You call a bathing suit a 'swimming costume'.
You call a traffic light a 'robot'.
You call an elevator a 'lift'
You call a hood a 'bonnet'
You call a trunk a 'boot'
You call a pickup truck a 'bakkie'
You call a Barbeque a 'Braai'
The employees dance in front of the building to show how unhappy they are.
The SABC advertises and shows highlights of the programme you just finished watching.
You get cold easily. Anything below 16 degrees Celsius is Arctic weather.
You know what Rooibos Tea is, even if you've never had any.
You can sing your national anthem in four languages, and you have no idea what it means in any of them.
You know someone who knows someone who has met Nelson Mandela.
You go to braais regularly, where you eat boerewors and swim, sometimes simultaneously.
You produce a R100 note instead of your driver's licence when stopped by a traffic officer.
You can do your monthly shopping on the pavement.
You have to hire a security guard whenever you park your car.
When you are a victim of crime and say: 'At least I'm still alive'.
You know a taxi can move twice it's certified number of people in one trip.
You travel 100's of kilometres to see snow.
You know the rules of Rugby better than any referee
More people vote in a local reality TV show than in a local election.
People have the most wonderful names: Christmas, Goodwill, Pretty, Wednesday, Blessing, Brilliant, Gift, Precious, Innocence and Given, April, January, September, Patience, Portion, Coronation.
'Now now' or 'just now' can mean anything from a minute to a month.
You continue to wait after a traffic light has turned to green to make way for taxis travelling in the opposite direction.
Travelling at 120 km/h you're the slowest vehicle on the highway/freeway.
You're genuinely and pleasantly surprised whenever you find your car parked where you left it.
A bullet train is being introduced, but we can't fix potholes.
The last time you visited the coast you paid more in speeding fines and toll fees than you did for the entire holiday.
You paint your car's registration on the roof.
You have to take your own linen with you if you are admitted to a government hospital.
You have to prove that you don't need a loan to get one.
Prisoners go on strike.
You don't stop at a red traffic light, in case somebody hijacks your car.
You consider it a good month if you only get mugged once.
Ruwandan refugees start leaving the country because the crime rate is too high.

You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from SA.

VIVA !!!!!

Lekker slaap om die Wêreld:

HOLLAND: Goeden nagt

AUSTRALIE: Night Mate

USA: Goodnite

DUITSLAND: Släfin si wöl

SUID AFRIKA: Is die deure gesluit, die vensters toegemaak,die kar ingetrek en die alarm geaktiveer? Is die Rotweilers gebêre en veilig? Lekker slaap, moenie worry nie, Eskom sal die ligte afsit!

Shake, Rattle ‘n Roll

Hardly a day goes by without news of some natural disaster. A flood here, a volcano there, a hurricane in the Gulf of Mexico or bush fires in Australia. Whatever it is it’s now blamed on Global Warming. This makes a change from the usual suspect of fifty years ago – the Atom Bomb. Except if it happens in the Free State then it’s because the Dominee went fishing on Sunday on the other side of the Vaal River in the ou Transvaal instead of attending to God’s work. Dis waar!

With all this going on the earthquake that struck Great Britain last week went somewhat unnoticed. The Brits faced the disaster with the usual Bulldog spirit. They were out and about the next day with ‘business as usual’ and offering cheerful greetings to each other such as ‘…’ee by gumm Gladys, did Earth move for you last night?’ or ‘Me Old Man says no more curried eggs for him!’

Small as Britain is we must not forget that it too has its share of great disasters and consequent damage. The recent ‘quake was no exception as the photograph shows.

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Proudly South African